So now that I have sufficiently brought this blog up to date from a timeline perspective, I wanted to address something that is near and dear to my heart: the masculinity of ballroom dance. Somewhere along the way, a notion got circulated that only gay men or “men that weren’t real men” danced. Granted I have only been at this for 6 months, but I am of the firm opinion that not only is ballroom dance masculine but it’s the most masculine thing any man could do and this article serves to help explain it.
DISCLAIMER: In order to make my next point effectively, I have to put on a bit of a chauvinist hat for a second. If anything is offensive in any way, I certainly apologize.
OK, that said, let’s really think about ballroom dancing for a second. I want to limit this discussion to only the smooth dances, but it can be extrapolated to the rhythm ones as well. The first tenant of ballroom dancing is that the man (lead) controls the dance, choreography, etc and the follow has to understand what he’s trying to tell her and dance accordingly. So, in a sense, she has to submit to his will for the dance to work. If the woman tries to exert her will (go against what the man has intended), it’s his job to take her where he wants to go. Of course, he has to communicate clearly as well. But looking at it as a dominant-submissive relationship, you have to see that at the very least dancing is incredibly empowering for the man. This is precisely why women’s rights groups are always up in arms over ballroom dance.
Next, at the core of any man’s psyche is the desire to have attractive women near them and to be desired by them. First, because there’s such a scarcity of men that ballroom dance, you are immediately desired (in one way or another) by the women that want to dance. Also, women that dance are much more attractive than women that don’t. Then, a man that dances well communicates very desirable traits about him: confidence, poise, strength, and style. So, by engaging in ballroom dance, you become extremely desirable to attractive women. Then, depending on which dance you’re doing, you are allowed to touch these women at various points on their body (all over it in some cases). I don’t care who you are, but there is nothing more masculine than being desired by women and being allowed to touch them in a socially acceptable setting.
I guess the final point I’ll make on this topic is that because of the scarcity of men in the sport, to dance well means you are part of an elite crowd. So for those competitive men out there, you have to take pride in the fact that this is something that is extremely hard to do well and you are better at something than 99% of the male population.
I hope I made my point. I’m sure this little blog article won’t make a difference.
Oh, and by way, for those of you men that want to make fun of any heterosexual male dancer, just try it once around the dance floor and see how well you do!